"check your levels" by Justin C.M. Brown (7.29.2024)
every time i poop or pee
i ask my body what it needs
sometimes food and sometimes sleep
close my eyes for time to breathe
or my battery’s low and need to leave
water sugar salt protein
eat some carbs and something green
in the morning some caffiene
not too little not too much
i only need a gentle touch
if i want to enjoy my day
i ask my body to show the way
check your levels
a photography series
about checking in
with your body's needs
by Justin C.M. Brown
august twentytwentyfour
"check your levels" is a photography series about checking in with your body's needs.
This artist statement explains the logic and process of creating this series.
First, the phrase "check your levels". For several years now, I have tried to pay close attention to my mental and emotional states. Through this conscious attention, I have been able to create associations between negative mental states and specific nutritional deficiencies. For example, I made the connection that whenever I was upset due to feeling plagued with indecision (can't decide what to eat, what assignment to do first, etc...), I was typically dehydrated. A couple of gulps of water, and I could feel my ability to decide return. Similarly, I noticed that when I was having negative thought spirals (self deprecation, unfair judgement of others, anxiety, etc...) it related to low blood sugar, and when I would eat the smallest amount of sugar (juice, candy), my mood would return to normal. When I would feel lethargic (backpack too heavy, unmotivated to do errands, etc), I realized this was a lack of sodium. A handful of nuts or chips would bring me back.
I'm aware that this is an extremely reductive approach to nutrition, but in my own experience, it worked so many times that I came to rely on consuming specific foods as a second step in identifying my mental states. It's one thing to be able to identify frustration due to indecisiveness, it's another thing to have the ability to TRY something to alleviate it. I emphasize the word try because well... sometimes it's something else. That's fine, what's important is that I'm taking an active role in identifying my mental state with the understanding that it is (somewhat) within my control.
Now, the question is, if I'm aware that I can intervene in certain mental states through an attention to my body's needs, can I proactively address these needs consistently to avoid the negative mental state in the first place? Clearly, by the time I'm observing this state, I've probably been experiencing it for any number of hours before the reflection. What I decided to do, was to try to build a habit of routinely checking in with my body and mind to note my mental state and any potential deficiencies in advance. But to be honest, I can be a very focused/distracted/absorbed person at times. What I needed was a sign or signal or interruption to remind me to do this pro-active checkin. It's all well and good to have this plan to check in with myself, but it's really just adding one more thing that I'll forget to do when I'm in my work/creative trance state. As an example, I tried to take vitamin D supplements during the winter, and I had them directly on my desk in my eye line, but without a conscious reminder, they just disappeared on my desk.
I needed a moment in my day which was not already occupied by conscious thought. I've learned previously that one form of behavior modification is "anchoring"; which is basically associating one existing habit with a new one. I needed to find a habit in my day that I could anchor my new desire to evaluate my physical and mental state. It needed to be something that I did multiple times a day, it needed to be something that did not require my full attention, it needed to be long enough that I could actually evaluate my states. My first thought was cooking, or maybe drinking. But this was in the wrong order, when I was eating or drinking, I was already fixing the issue which I had identified.
So what is something I do frequently throughout the day that doesn't require my full attention and takes long enough to give a good stop-and-think? Going to the bathroom! Of course! Not only does it check all of those boxes, it also can be done anywhere if I'm away from home, and it is explicitly done in a private setting when I can have a moment to think. Now that I had identified my ideal existing behavior that I could use as an anchor, I needed a way to trigger my own second step of evaluating my mental and physical state. It needed to be memorable and effective, something that would play automatically in my head.
Hence, the rhyme: "every time I poop or pee, I ask my body what it needs".
I found this rhyme to be entertaining enough to warrant a 30 piece series. And to be honest, I convinced myself that if I could successfully create a subconscious anchor in any number of audience members which led them to be more in tune with their bodies, it was actually a social project worth pursuing. So once again, I went back to the anchoring idea. I was hoping that I could anchor the rhyme with the image of a toilet, this time through repetition. I went to various businesses in Los Angeles and took pictures of their toilets. Now... this wasn't quite enough for me. I needed to take it to a place which was strange enough that it would prompt a closer examination. I tried a couple of photo manipulations, but nothing really grabbed me until I realized that umm... people aren't so sensitive to images of toilets, but they really don't like looking into the bowls of toilets. Despite the natural aversion to looking into toilets, that is naturally where the eye goes. So I replaced all the toilet bowls with images of flowers, to create a kind of image which was equal parts banal and surreal, and hopefully mildly pleasant or memorable.
And so that is my logic and process behind creating this series. As an addition during the release process (which I'll admit felt like a very long month), I decided to include specific reference to all the vitamins, minerals, and experiences that a body may need. I titled these pieces as potential answers to the question "what does my body need right now?" Now, I don't personally have a strong enough connection with my body to recognize my current level of phosphorous or manganese... but I think it's an important reminder that our bodies are complex organisms which require a wide range of nutrients. I think it's to say: if we want our bodies to function in a high quality fashion, it's absolutely necessary to eat a wide variety of healthy and natural foods. It's also necessary to participate in physically and spiritually nourishing activities, while also performing basic maintenance and self care.
In this challenging period of human history, it's all too easy for the noise and static of every day life to drown out the messages our bodies are sending us. No matter who you are, the pace of modern life means that we get very little time to check in with ourselves.
I hope this series is a reminder to check in with yourself and your body's needs.
Thank you for your time and attention, I do not take it for granted.
I would be thrilled to know if this experiment in behavior anchoring has been successful for anyone.
In gratitude,
Justin C.M. Brown, 9/4/2024
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